"Tell them that nobody ever wants to be an alcoholic; that alcoholism flowers in some people but not in others; and that Grandma just drew the wrong straw. And then add this reassuring fact: It won't happen to them, because you're going to teach them how to avoid the problem, no matter what straw they draw."
My only addition to her advice would be to find an Al-Anon group or other support group for family members of alcoholics for on-going support. Read the entire column here.
Though I realize that this article was written in response to a question posed regarding how to talk with young children about alcoholism in the family, I am disinclined to ever offer the advice to children that," It won't happen to them, because you're going to teach them how to avoid the problem, no matter what straw they draw."
ReplyDeletePast and emerging scientific research continues to hone in on the brain chemistry of alcoholics and addicts. It clearly defines alcoholism and addiction as a disease. It is indeed a baffling one, particularly for the families of those afflicted. However, if society continues to perceive alcoholism and addiction as an unfortunate lack of self will which can be "avoided", then related behaviors will remain a disappointment and embarrassment to loved ones and essential support and rehabilitation can be long in coming.
The critical points that the author makes are the following, "...they’ll have to be extra careful if they decide to drink one day because anyone whose grandparent, parent, aunt or uncle is an alcoholic is four times as likely to become one, too."
Additionally, "Above all, they should know that alcoholism is a terminal disease, which is the scariest fact of all, but, one hopes, also a sobering one."
Families can begin the process of recovery if, as you suggest, support is sought through those best equipped to offer it.
Thank you Ann for addressing such a confusing and pervasive topic. Cheri
Thank you for the clarification and information, Cheri! It seemed as though Kelly's response about "drawing straws" was an attempt to remove the erroneous belief that a lack of self-discipline is the cause of the problem. Further explanation could be done using an analogy with another disease (how adjustments in lifestyle are necessary when you are diagnosed with Heart Disease, for example).
ReplyDeleteI was surprised that Kelly did not suggest an Al-Anon group or a support group, which I find to be integral.